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Just keep the rest of your accessories simple to avoid looking too flashy

You could wear a dark monochromatic pocket square, but if you do this, you could run the risk of looking like your pocket square and tie came in a matching set, which is never a good look

If it has some other variation, which is quite common nowadays, like festive formal or semi-formal, you may have to consult with the bride, groom, or fellow guests for more details

I always think black dresses are their own statement so I want my accessories to compliment the look and not take over

When I wear black I go in this order for shoe options: Nude, neutral, black, white

The Black-Tie Optional phrasing is likely intended to sound more inviting and less severe